Forgiveness
We just got done with an incredible study on forgiveness in my Wednesday night Bible study. This was an issue I thought I had really dealt with in the past year *you know, so I could offer great insight to others in the class who were still dealing with it--yes, I am apparently that arrogant.* In his book, “Forgiveness," Dr. Charles Stanley lists the 5 symptoms of an unforgiving spirit. They are:
In his sermon on Sunday, Pastor Mike talked about the miracle in Acts 3 when Peter and John healed the lame beggar. He pointed out something I had never thought of before: the man's healing had nothing to do with his own faith. It was Peter who had the faith to speak healing over him in the name of Jesus. How many blessings have I missed (and taken away from others) because I was too prideful to let my guard down and be vulnerable in the midst of a trial? I have relied on my own faith. What if the beggar would have said "I'm too humiliated to go out in public like this. I will wait for God to heal me first." He may have never been healed, and would have robbed Peter and John of the blessing of the miracle.
I don't like facing these obnoxious flaws in myself and my faith (and I hate even more admitting it to others). It hurts. Forgiveness hurts. It was much easier to believe I didn't have unforgiveness than to deal with it. My Bible study leader said: "...as painful as it may seem, forgiveness of those who have hurt us is not always for their benefit, but is absolutely and completely always for our benefit. This is a process. It will take time, but the time to begin to be willing to totally forgive must begin immediately."
There are two things from our discussion that stuck out to me. The first is this: Unforgiveness is like a gateway drug. It may seem small, but it leads to the really bad stuff. The second is: Commiserating with someone else is like feeding your unforgiveness. It is very tempting to try to gain sympathy. Bitterness can become a friend and we nurture it every time we talk about the issue. This is especially easy with others who may feel the same way about the person you need to forgive.
We are done studying forgiveness on Wednesday nights, but I'm far from being done with it. My process is just beginning.
- You can’t “stand” to be around certain people.
- You want to strike out at people when certain subjects are discussed.
- You lose your temper over little things.
- You struggle with guilt over things that happened in the past.
- You find yourself hating the ones you should love the most.
In his sermon on Sunday, Pastor Mike talked about the miracle in Acts 3 when Peter and John healed the lame beggar. He pointed out something I had never thought of before: the man's healing had nothing to do with his own faith. It was Peter who had the faith to speak healing over him in the name of Jesus. How many blessings have I missed (and taken away from others) because I was too prideful to let my guard down and be vulnerable in the midst of a trial? I have relied on my own faith. What if the beggar would have said "I'm too humiliated to go out in public like this. I will wait for God to heal me first." He may have never been healed, and would have robbed Peter and John of the blessing of the miracle.
I don't like facing these obnoxious flaws in myself and my faith (and I hate even more admitting it to others). It hurts. Forgiveness hurts. It was much easier to believe I didn't have unforgiveness than to deal with it. My Bible study leader said: "...as painful as it may seem, forgiveness of those who have hurt us is not always for their benefit, but is absolutely and completely always for our benefit. This is a process. It will take time, but the time to begin to be willing to totally forgive must begin immediately."
There are two things from our discussion that stuck out to me. The first is this: Unforgiveness is like a gateway drug. It may seem small, but it leads to the really bad stuff. The second is: Commiserating with someone else is like feeding your unforgiveness. It is very tempting to try to gain sympathy. Bitterness can become a friend and we nurture it every time we talk about the issue. This is especially easy with others who may feel the same way about the person you need to forgive.
We are done studying forgiveness on Wednesday nights, but I'm far from being done with it. My process is just beginning.
posted by Jules @ 9:47 PM
2 Comments:
At April 03, 2008 1:55 PM,
Kayla said…
Good post! The other thing from class that really spoke to me was when we were talking about "what if they hurt me again" and I don't know who said it or if it was a combination of everyones thoughts... but what I came away with that was that they probably will continue to hurt us. But we don't need to tell them. We just need to forgive and keep forgiving or else we'll become as ugly and bitter as those who hurt us. That was HUGE for me. While I have worked through a lot of unforgiveness over the years... there are others that instead of forgiving, I have just "accepted and avoided"
At April 03, 2008 8:34 PM,
Amy said…
great stuff. I learned a lot about forgiveness a few months ago from the book of Philemon, of all the surprising places. I'll try to remember to look at it again--seems like there was a great quote or two.
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